How to Talk About Money with Your Partner

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Discussing Finances with Partner
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Is there a right way to talk about money with your partner? There certainly is. After all, you don’t want to end up arguing over money. If you can approach the topic of money in the right way, it should be much easier to talk about!

It’s well known that money problems are one of the leading causes of divorce. To help you avoid becoming part of these statistics these tips will help you to find it easier to talk about money with your partner.

Tips For Talking About Money With Your Partner

These tips are easy enough for anyone to follow. Remember, the goal is to build trust with your partner and have honest communication with them about money.

Learn To Compromise

Everyone has their own values when it comes to money. Some people love to spend, spend, spend! Others like to save as much as they can for a rainy day.

If you and your partner share the same values that’s fantastic and will make life more harmonious.

However, problems can arise when your opinions differ. Maybe one day you want to make a large purchase using credit, but your partner is dead set against it as they don’t like taking on more debt. Here is where learning to compromise will make it easier.

There will be times when one of you might have to agree to disagree. Alternatively, you may need to compromise by agreeing to a solution in the middle. For example, you may agree you will use credit for purchases, but only up to an agreed amount. 

Understanding each other’s values and learning to compromise is a great way to build trust with each other around finances.

Don’t Dwell On Stuff

Money is something we all must learn to manage. When we are combining finances with a partner it’s best to discuss how we feel about money openly and honestly.

Sometimes people fail to do this which means over time resentment builds up. Your partner may spend too much, save too little, or just not care about making sure bills are paid on time.

Whatever the problem is if you don’t say anything it will never get better!

Don’t dwell on things until it explodes into an argument. Discuss money daily to make sure you are both in agreement with how it’s being managed.

Be A Team

When you’re in a partnership it means you need to be on the same page when it comes to money and hopefully everything else. One great way to be a successful team is by playing to each other’s strengths.

One of you might be super organized which means they are better at planning the budget and tracking spending. The other partner might be awesome at saving and living frugally. Giving responsibility for each task to the right person is a great way to be a successful team.

This doesn’t mean you aren’t both involved. Make sure you still make decisions together and talk about all options. It’s important you both know what the other is doing!

Don’t Be A Financial Cheater

Financial Cheating
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There may be times you think keeping a purchase a secret is a good idea. Perhaps you think your partner will be angry and you want to avoid an argument.

Recent studies show that more than half of Americans have committed financial infidelity. Financial infidelity includes things like secret spending, hiding debts, and not declaring savings.

You may think you’ve got a good reason to hide the truth from your partner. However, when they find out the truth the relationship could be ended. Even when small amounts are involved that loss of trust can be hard to win back. 

The good news is that if you are following the other steps and regularly talking about money, you shouldn’t need to lie!

How To Talk About Money

Whether your relationship is new or decades-long you may be struggling to bring up the topic of money. It can be difficult if it’s something you’ve argued about in the past.

To start with it’s best to bring up the topic of money when you are both willing to talk about it. Simply ask the question, ‘Hey, would you mind if we chat about money for a bit?’

By putting this simple question out there first your partner should hopefully feel at ease to discuss the topic. This makes things much easier instead of just diving into tough questions without warning. Sometimes your partner may say no – that’s OK. Just let them know it’s a topic you need to talk about soon. 

Of course, if they keep avoiding it, then you may need to decide if that’s a deal-breaker for you and consider ending the relationship.

It’s also advisable to talk about the easy things first. Start by talking about long-term goals. Leave things like tackling debt for when you are both more comfortable.

Finally, some people feel very vulnerable when discussing their finances. It can be especially hard for people that have struggled with debt, mental health, or maybe financial abuse from parents or a previous partner.

Keep this in mind and don’t be judgmental about their past behavior. You are now a team and should be building trust in each other. This means whatever problems there are you will tackle them together going forward. Judging will only upset your partner and possibly cause a relationship break down!

Two Ways To Improve Your Finances

OK, you and your partner now know some awesome ways to better talk about money. If you are struggling with money here a couple of suggestions that might help you improve your situation.

Be Frugal

To live frugally doesn’t mean never spending any money. It simply means you are extremely careful about every cent you spend. Living frugally is a great way to become better off financially, get out of debt, or just live a simpler life.

Frugal living tips include budgeting every cent, saving as much as you can, and using cashback sites to earn some money back. When shopping, always hunt for bargains and try switching to cheaper brands. Many cheaper options are just as good as the big brands!

Don’t forget as part of creating a frugal budget to negotiate all bills and cut out all unnecessary spending. 

Start A Side Hustle

A great way to improve your financial situation is by starting a side hustle. How can you make an extra $1000 a month? The great news is there are lots of ways to make extra money. $1000 extra month is doable with a little effort.

With that extra money, you could pay off debt quicker, build an emergency fund, or simply use it as spending money. Remember, you and your partner should agree about what you are doing with the money!

Blogging, freelancing, driving for Uber, and selling handmade goods on Etsy are just some of the hundreds of things you could do to earn extra money. Have a think about your skills and see if you can use them to start a side hustle.

Maybe you could even do something together!

Next Steps

Now that you’ve read these tips, I hope you feel better about discussing money with your partner. You should be able to talk about money without it turning into an argument if you stick to this advice. 

Chris Panteli
Chris Panteli

Hey, I’m Chris. I have a degree in Business Economics from the University of Liverpool, own a small fast food business and run LifeUpswing.com. I will help you to make money, save money, and think about money in a way that will give you back your freedom.

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